I have struggled with anxiety my whole life. I have read every article, book and pamphlet in the doctor’s office waiting room and online. I understand anxiety. I understand how to cope with it. I understand that many share this struggle with me. What I don’t understand is why I have it. How did this happen and why can’t I fix it? I can only assume that it is the result of past traumas and a life with too much stress combined with my Type A personality, my personal expectations for myself and an undeniable need to control what I cannot.

The interesting part, is that I know who I am and I know where I need to improve. Awareness is half the battle, right? So why do I still feel this way? This is a question that I often ask myself.

On one of many nights, as I lay awake thinking about life, overthinking everything on my plate, analyzing the details of my day, falling into a state of negativity and feeling an overwhelming anxiousness, I had a moment of clarity amongst the chaos that my heart, mind and body were feeling.

I realized that I can be a victim of my anxiety or I can stand up to it and beat it. I realized that I can keep understanding why I have it and never do anything about it except cope, or I can stop coping and start doing.

Anxiety Disorder is classified as a medical condition. One that often goes unrecognized. There are ways to treat it with medication, but that isn’t for me. Not that this doesn’t work for others, to each their own. But for me, that would be just another coping mechanism.

My anxiety is internal. It stems from the areas in my life and being that need improvement. I need a different kind of medication, and it doesn’t come in a bottle. I need personal development, I need a mindset shift, I need self-care. I need to change the head that I am currently living in. I know what I need to do, and I’m prepared to do it. I’m prepared to become a better step-mother, a better daughter, a better fiancé, a better friend and a better business owner. A better me.

I am on a never-ending journey to be the best possible version of myself, we all are. Nobody is perfect. We all have room to improve and taking the time to personally develop and take care of ourselves is the conscious choice to improve one’s life to become a better person and to grow as an individual.

 I am learning, that with every next level of life; there is a demand for a different version of yourself. As a result, we must always be growing, evolving, learning and improving. Changing your mindset, your lifestyle and your priorities requires a lifetime of education and a commitment to personal growth. I will forever be a student in this department and will always work to improve my relationships, my career, my confidence and my businesses

Old ways won’t open new doors and we only get this one life. From now on, I DECIDE MY VIBE.
And you should too….

Allison Rose

Allison Rose
Latest posts by Allison Rose (see all)