“I don’t have time to take care of myself”… My sweet friend, this is a story you are telling yourself. It goes right along with the story that sounds like “I just need to wash the dishes, help my son with his homework, and send off this email for work and then I will sit down to eat.”⠀
Let’s be honest, by the time you do sit down to eat you are so exhausted it feels like all you can do is push start on the microwave burrito. So yes, it does FEEL like you don’t have time to take care of yourself. But is it TRUE?⠀
What if you were to decide to move yourself up on the priority list? What if the story you told yourself sounded more like…
“I am worth spending time on myself so my cup is filled.”
“When I take time for me, I feel good about myself and ready to show up as the woman I know I am meant to be.”⠀
I can hear the thoughts in your head now…. They sound a lot like the thoughts that I battled for years.
“Yes, I KNOW I should take care of myself, but how do I do that?”
“I am taking care of so much in my life I can’t add one more thing to my to do list…. Even myself.”
“This sounds good in theory but what do I give up? Everything in my life feels too important to let go.”
I’m going to let you in on a little secret. It’s the secret sauce that allowed me to start taking care of myself without guilt, without overwhelm and without sacrificing my firstborn child. When I did this one thing, taking care of myself became easy, it became something that happened with ease. I didn’t have to add it to my to do list, it didn’t take any more time, I didn’t even have to visit a spa to get it.
What was it?
I expanded my self worth container. I started to believe that I was worth more, that I deserved to be cherished. When my self worth container expanded, I created space to receive more. I received more self-love, respect, confidence and peace because I allowed myself to believe I was worth having it.
Want to expand your self worth container. Here are three tips to get you started.
- Discover your True Self
You are not the stories you tell yourself. The stories that sound like
“When the scale hits a certain number then I will love myself.”
“When my to do list is complete then I will give myself permission to take care of me”
These stories center on lack and a feeling of Never Enough, always searching for more and attempting to pour from an empty cup.
You are not the stories you tell yourself, you are so much more. At your core you are infinite possibility, divine potential. This is the story you can choose to tell yourself. A story of love, abundance and absolute ENOUGH-NESS!
So take a moment to pause and give yourself 10 minutes to get to know the best version of you. Ask yourself the question… How does my best self show up? What does she think, feel, and believe? Write down your answers in a journal, on a napkin, or on your notepad during the next boring conference call.
My clients say this feels like “coming home” to themselves. So I invite you, come home to yourself!
- Give yourself permission to have what you want
When I first started doing this I had to start at the most basic level… listening to when I needed to use the bathroom.
I had to give myself permission to listen and honor my body’s need to pee!
So start here if you have to. Recognize all the areas that you deny yourself what you want. Then the most important step… listen to the stories that are playing in the background that keep you stuck. Does it sound like, “Just one more email and then I will go to the bathroom,” which is the lyrics of the song, “my needs can wait until I take care of everyone else.” Just notice… that awareness is powerful. What you can see you can change.
- Release the voice of criticism
Often we use criticism as a motivator for change. The thought is, “if I just beat myself up enough, then I will be motivated to change.” If I hate my body enough, then I will be motivated to eat better tomorrow. Ask yourself, how is that working for you?
Try motivating yourself from a place of love instead of fear. Notice the voice of criticism, breathe into it and let it go. Just release its hold on you. That creates space for a new voice to enter. Ask yourself, if I were coming from a place of love, how would I show up? What choice would I make to nourish my body from a place of compassion?
Use the three steps to practice the art of expanding your self-worth container. This is the heart of self-care and the path to taking care of yourself.
In love and service to you!